The Curse of Time

i wanna be the one that make you smile
也许时间是一种解药，也是我现在正服下的毒药

class bbq on friday~ ended up coming a lil late due to underestimation and all.. lol but aww well.. wasnt as fun as i expected it to be.. didnt get to be the cook because my lenses hurt if i stay there for longer than 30mins.. so yea ended up just eating the food cooked by zhonghua and gang.. so not used eating food not cooked by me.. aww well onli ate a stingray which i put on top of the pit and a sausage and a lil fried rice.. didnt really have the appetite..

time seems to past too quickly does it.. suddenly im back to a life with no objective.. everyday passing by just as it is.. staring into blank space.. relatively lower morale.. and with no one caring.. its so hard to break free of this shackles.. i wanna time lapse.. i wanna back track

i wanna go 5 years back.. and cherish that year more.. undo wad i missed.. enjoy the playing life with my friends

i wanna go back to 1 and a half year's back.. cause i really miss sec 4 life.. perfect life.. good friends watching over, doing everything together.. a class that is one.. where cliques are no where to be found.. total freedom.. no worries no stress no problems.. the only thing bad then was an incomplete heart.. but would i rather go through the sufferings to fulfill that?

i wanna go 1 year back.. to stop myself while i still could.. to keep my social life within the school.. to prevent a great loss and a many mighty prices paid..

i wanna go 2 weeks back.. where it isnt freezing cold.. where it was filled with warmth.. where i wake up and sleep happy.. where i believed..

god please grant me the ability to trescend time.. to go back in time.. im willing to pay any price
y am i incapable of making you smile?